2023 Self Portraits | PhenomenaLewis

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2023

"Crave" a self-portrait by, Lewis Derogene aka PhenomenaLewis, published in January 2023 photographed in her bedroom in Connecticut. This fine art photograph shows PhenomenaLewis, a dark-skinned Black woman in the nude with her head covered by a pink blanket that's seen slightly wrapped around her body surrounded by darkness with a light touch of colored lights.
When I was photographing this shot, it was during the same photoshoot as my untitled self portrait photo. I was in a moment of anguish and longing for better but not knowing how to get there. It's funny because I made this in 2022 in the spring time and the feeling is still the same now.
So, I titled this "Crave" because I still want better for myself, but like in the photograph, I have my back turned which represents me turning my back on myself because now I'm afraid any effort I put in will be for nothing.

"One" a self-portrait by, Lewis Derogene aka PhenomenaLewis, published in June 2023 photographed in her bedroom in Connecticut.
In this fine art photograph, you see PhenomenaLewis, a Haitian Black woman standing strong while looking off into the distance with a regal presence against a colorful galactic night sky.

"In My Head" a self-portrait photograph by Lewis Derogene aka PhenomenaLewis, published in August 2023.
In My Head is a self-portrait photograph that represents the feelings of comfort, safety, love and trust in my mind ever since deciding to really focus on my relationship with God. I find myself more at peace and this is what it looks like in my head.

To create this self-portrait I photographed myself laying on top of my pillows on my bed while holding my over 15 years old flute in my hands. I used my canon rebel t7 camera to shoot this and for the environment around me I used Nomad Sculpt to 3D model everything around me. I set the lighting on nomad sculpt to match the lighting positions and angles from when I photographed myself to make it easy to composite and render together on Adobe Photoshop.

The Let it Go series is a self-portrait photograph by Lewis Derogene, artistically known as PhenomenaLewis. This series was photographed in PhenomenaLewis’ home in 2023.
“Let it Go is about releasing all the personal offenses that I feel. Bit by bit I take things personally in my life whether something was done intentionally or unintentionally to make me upset. It starts to crowd in my mind and becomes something I have scenarios about throughout my day and that can be pretty heavy to carry.
In light of different situations in my life, be it relationships, work or my spiritual life, I decided to let it go and what that looks like for me is to loosen my heavily weighted mind.
To represent that I photographed myself grabbing my hair in a tight grip and loosening it until I completely let it go.
The tension of holding to disdain is always in our heads and it affects us more than it affects people around us until it does. It’s a psychological response to not knowing how to talk about what’s bothering us. We bottle the hurt in until we explode whether that looks like physically falling ill, having a breakdown or falling off the edge.
It’s not good to hold it in, even if the conversation that needs to be had is hard to swallow for the other person, it will eventually come to a solution whether that involves a mediator or the people involved hash it out. It’s important to let it go, for the sake of those around you, and for your sake as well.

Part 1 is the first step in this process where I'm holding on to the hurt demonstrated by grabbing hold of my hair.”

The Let it Go series is a self-portrait photograph by Lewis Derogene, artistically known as PhenomenaLewis. This series was photographed in PhenomenaLewis’ home in 2023.
“Let it Go is about releasing all the personal offenses that I feel. Bit by bit I take things personally in my life whether something was done intentionally or unintentionally to make me upset. It starts to crowd in my mind and becomes something I have scenarios about throughout my day and that can be pretty heavy to carry.
In light of different situations in my life, be it relationships, work or my spiritual life, I decided to let it go and what that looks like for me is to loosen my heavily weighted mind.
To represent that I photographed myself grabbing my hair in a tight grip and loosening it until I completely let it go.
The tension of holding to disdain is always in our heads and it affects us more than it affects people around us until it does. It’s a psychological response to not knowing how to talk about what’s bothering us. We bottle the hurt in until we explode whether that looks like physically falling ill, having a breakdown or falling off the edge.
It’s not good to hold it in, even if the conversation that needs to be had is hard to swallow for the other person, it will eventually come to a solution whether that involves a mediator or the people involved hash it out. It’s important to let it go, for the sake of those around you, and for your sake as well.
Part 2 is the part of the process that takes a lot of courage to do which is letting go demonstrated by loosening my grip on my hair."

The Let it Go series is a self-portrait photograph by Lewis Derogene, artistically known as PhenomenaLewis. This series was photographed in PhenomenaLewis’ home in 2023.
“Let it Go is about releasing all the personal offenses that I feel. Bit by bit I take things personally in my life whether something was done intentionally or unintentionally to make me upset. It starts to crowd in my mind and becomes something I have scenarios about throughout my day and that can be pretty heavy to carry.
In light of different situations in my life, be it relationships, work or my spiritual life, I decided to let it go and what that looks like for me is to loosen my heavily weighted mind.
To represent that I photographed myself grabbing my hair in a tight grip and loosening it until I completely let it go.
The tension of holding to disdain is always in our heads and it affects us more than it affects people around us until it does. It’s a psychological response to not knowing how to talk about what’s bothering us. We bottle the hurt in until we explode whether that looks like physically falling ill, having a breakdown or falling off the edge.
It’s not good to hold it in, even if the conversation that needs to be had is hard to swallow for the other person, it will eventually come to a solution whether that involves a mediator or the people involved hash it out. It’s important to let it go, for the sake of those around you, and for your sake as well.
Part 3 is the final step where you're free from all the baggage you were holding on to."

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