Self Portraits

Afro Cogitatio [Self Portraiture]

My self portraits as a whole is a window into my mind which is very much cluttered. Influenced by my want to no longer bare my soul to the world in it’s rawest form due to how exhausting it was, I’ve changed my practice to be more calming and organized.

Creating art of discomfort required strength I realized I didn’t have. That realization came when I saw that I was willingly placing myself in the stereotypical box of what society thinks a Black woman is.

Angry, tough, and every adjective mainly associated with men.

Now I am creating art of softness.

"Crave" a self-portrait by, Lewis Derogene aka PhenomenaLewis, published in January 2023 photographed in her bedroom in Connecticut. This fine art photograph shows PhenomenaLewis, a dark-skinned Black woman in the nude with her head covered by a pink blanket that's seen slightly wrapped around her body surrounded by darkness with a light touch of colored lights.
When I was photographing this shot, it was during the same photoshoot as my untitled self portrait photo. I was in a moment of anguish and longing for better but not knowing how to get there. It's funny because I made this in 2022 in the spring time and the feeling is still the same now.
So, I titled this "Crave" because I still want better for myself, but like in the photograph, I have my back turned which represents me turning my back on myself because now I'm afraid any effort I put in will be for nothing.

2022

"Grasping" a self-portrait photograph by PhenomenaLewis made in October of 2022, photographer in her bedroom. This Black and white photograph shows PhenomenaLewis, a dark-skinned Black woman, laying down on her bed with her back exposed. The composition only reveals her upper back and part of her head. This self-portrait photograph of PhenomenaLewis is in Black and white and it's a double exposure of her hands grasping her back.
When I made this self-portrait, it was in the midst of my recovery from a car accident that had happened a few months prior.
My healing was more than physical, it was also psychological. My need to forgive the reckless driver that crashed into my car was something I felt I needed to do for the pain in my back to feel less heavy.
I was grasping at the need to heal in all these ways and I wanted to document this.

2023

2022