Before I start, I just want to mention that I hope this blog, as my first ever will spark a conversation between creators on mental support that covers all aspects of life.
As a human living in this God forsaken capitalist, misogynistic, and racist world, we all struggle. Correction, the majority of us, not all.
It’s easy to distract ourselves from the many hardships we have to face, but what happens if you’re not given a break and you just keep getting more hardships back to back – hardships that go beyond financial and targets every aspect of life?
I used to think that the worse point in my life was when I only had 33 cents in my bank account my freshman year of college. I would use any scrap materials I could find in the studios to create my art assignments. If it’s your passion you find a way right?
However, what happens if that wasn’t the worse and I’m now 25 years old seeing my world end? What happens if there is no surface for me to swim up to in order to breath? What happens to my ability to create then?
I’m no longer foced to create art for a grade but now have full freedom to create as I please except, right now I can’t.
The many options and choices I had have been exhausted and now my brain, that’s supposed to keep me distracted from everything and anything bad, is hyper fixated on all of bad because it’s all it can see.
Without going into detail, let’s just say that my physical health, mental health, spiritual health, financial state, career state, friendship condition and all else are simultaneously burned down to ashes.
It’s been going on like this for over a year and at first I was optimistic that it wouldn’t last so long but now I know I can’t take it anymore.
I would force myself to create something, anything at all to distract myself. Now, my art looks like it’s a part of my plight.
This blog isn’t a how to overcome situations like this because your girl is still in the midst of it.
However, I do want to start the conversation for any other artists who are experiencing something similar or who have and just managed to reach the surface for a breath before their lungs exploded.
If I disappointed anyone with this blog, I don’t know what to tell you.
I haven’t been writing as much so this will be a clear reflection of the effects of my life.
I’m still creating art here and there, but now it almost feels like forcing myself to drink nasty medicine just to get better rather than willingly taking chewy vitamins that’s actually sweet.
Before I lose you completely which I fear I probably did after the first paragraph in this blog, nothing can keep an artist from creating.
You may take years before you pick up a medium and start creating again but doesn’t mean you’ve completely stopped.
Nothing truly can keep an artist from creating. Well, maybe death but even then how can we know for sure that whatever leaves our bodies won’t stop creating in the afterlife?